Adults across the UK spend more than £111 per month on dates and dating apps, equating to more than £1,300 per year, according to research from Barclays in 2025 – and with cocktails regularly topping £15, the question of who should foot the bill has never been more divisive.
Jennifer Read-Dominguez, a digital editor who is currently single, believes whoever asks for a first date should be prepared to pay for it. She says women “can absolutely foot the bill themselves but that’s not the point”. “Sometimes it’s nice to take a step back from always being the one making decisions and simply enjoy feeling feminine and being looked after.” For her, a man paying is not about dependence or inequality but “effort and keeping some traditional gestures alive in modern dating”.
“UK adults spend £111 a month on dates, sparking debate over who should pay on a first date.”
Yet one bad experience left her feeling taken advantage of. A man took her to an expensive restaurant, complained about the cost and suggested they split the bill. When his card failed, Jennifer ended up paying for the entire meal. “He said he’d pay me back, but he never did. I could afford it, but that’s not the point.” The experience left her feeling taken advantage of. “I think he assumed I’d simply absorb the cost and I did but I felt used.”
Yasmin El-Saie, a content creator from London, says she would be “put off if a man expected us to split the bill on a first date”. “When a man pays, he’s showing he wants his date to feel comfortable and looked after,” she says. “Maybe it’s a double standard and down to my upbringing, but I still find it attractive.” That doesn’t mean she expects men to pay for everything – if a date continues elsewhere, she is happy to contribute. “If he pays for dinner and we go for drinks afterwards, I’d happily get the drinks. I wouldn’t want anyone to feel used.” One memorable date involved a recent divorcee who was determined to keep finances separate. The pair went to a buffet restaurant where diners were charged according to the number of food sticks they …
For under 30s in particular, cost is a great barrier as over half of Gen Z adults feel the expense impacts their ability to go on dates. Jennifer says the amount spent matters far less than the thought behind it, and she’d be just as happy being taken to a fast-food restaurant as a high-end one, as long as it’s “within their means.”
As dating costs continue to rise and generational attitudes shift, the battle over the bill shows no sign of settling – leaving singletons to navigate a minefield of expectation, tradition and personal pride.