Over cocktails that regularly top £15 and restaurant bills climbing, adults across the UK spend more than £111 per month on dates and dating apps—£1,300 a year, according to Barclays’ 2025 research. For under-30s, the bite is sharpest: over half of Gen Z say the expense stops them from dating.
Few topics divide opinion like who should pay on a first date. Some insist the bill should always be split equally; others believe the person who sets up the date should pay. Despite changing attitudes towards gender roles, many still see a man picking up the bill as a romantic gesture, not an outdated tradition.
“UK adults spend over £111 a month on dating; many still expect the asker to pay.”
Jennifer Read-Dominguez, a single digital editor, thinks whoever asks for a first date should be prepared to pay for it. 'Women can absolutely foot the bill themselves but that's not the point,' she says. 'Sometimes it's nice to take a step back from always being the one making decisions and simply enjoy feeling feminine and being looked after.' For her, a man paying is about 'effort and keeping some traditional gestures alive in modern dating'. The amount matters less than the thought: she'd be just as happy at a fast-food restaurant as a high-end one, as long as it's 'within their means'.
One experience left her feeling taken advantage of. A man took her to an expensive restaurant, complained about the cost, and suggested they split. When his card failed, Jennifer ended up paying for the entire meal. 'He said he'd pay me back, but he never did. I could afford it, but that's not the point.' She felt used.
Yasmin El-Saie, a London content creator, says she would be 'put off if a man expected us to split the bill on a first date'. She explains, 'When a man pays, he's showing he wants his date to feel comfortable and looked after. Maybe it's a double standard and down to my upbringing, but I still find it attractive.' That doesn't mean she expects men to pay for everything: if a date continues elsewhere, she is happy to contribute. 'If he pays for dinner and we go for drinks afterwards, I'd happily get the drinks. I wouldn't want anyone to feel used.'
Yet not every date follows that pattern. One memorable evening involved a recent divorcee determined to keep finances separate. The pair went to a buffet restaurant where diners are charged according to the number of food sticks they take—a literal measure of his reluctance to share the bill.